Archive for August 28, 2011


When I have significant news I usually wait two days before I make it public on here. It’s a habit I got into. I might type up the blog, but then I mark it private for two days. I go back, reread and make sure that I’m saying what I want to say and not more, or less and then I update the time and switch it to public. 

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could do that in real life?

So, I updated my Friday blog to public a few minutes ago. The problem with this is that I want to type again now, so two posts it is.

It feels like I have been bombarding the world with information, constant blogging and constant facebooking, but when I look back it doesn’t appear I have been. Blogging dysmorphia?

I think people who have dealt with different cancers in their past attach more significance to cancer being found in the Lymph nodes than people who haven’t run across it before. I picture the lymph nodes as sort of the Turnpike of your body. (I don’t really know how accurate my information is, and I’m not going to go check right now) Once the cancer cells jump on the lymphatic system it gives them access to hop off anywhere around there is an exit. Hopefully the cells that were found in mine were just starting their journey. I do know that this upped my chance for reoccurrence later.  Bummer that!

I am so grateful that we all have such a bizarre sense of humor and can joke our way around the ugly parts. We’ve already had all the jokes about my probably drastic appearance change. Yeah, that’s right, seven years of letting my hair grow and investing in ridiculously expensive hair cleansers and it’s all going to fall out.  Uhg. This then turned into the dilemma of hair color. I am in need of a color and cut. Do I invest the time and money to have it done even though in all probability it will be gone in eight weeks? I decided yes. I have some things to do in September and I want to look strong and confident. I will try and get in next week to get that taken care of. 

And now I am done!

See ya.



eh, why not me?

I don’t think I’ve ever been one of those people who said “why me?” when something bad happens. I think when something bad happens to me it’s not for a reason, or a grand design, it just is. Why does that piece of dog fur fly through the air and land on my sandwich? Well, because a room away someone walked past the closed door and caused a miniscule shift in the air that meandered it’s way into this room and was the perfect weight and balance to lift one of the gazillion dog hairs in my house and have it land on my food. It’s not a karmic message about my sandwich or my eating. So when they told me Friday morning that cancer cells had been found in my lymph nodes I don’t think I ever thought why me? I’m not saying I like it.  I’m not all, YAY!  Chemo! Woohoo! Radiation! but I do think a part of me thinks, “Why not me?”  

It’s not the best news, but it’s certainly not the worst. They found cancer cells in two of the nine lymph nodes they removed. One from the left, one from the right. The results are still preliminary but so far that’s all they found.  Cancer cells confirmed on the cervix and two lymph nodes. Once my body is healed from the surgery I will begin a round of radiation & chemo. I know, no one wanted to hear that, but there you go. That should last about six weeks.  So, say we start in four weeks, then six weeks of treatment.  Round it up and we’ll just say three months. Three months from now I hopefully will start a lifetime of routine maintenance. Just scans and check ups to make sure there is no re-occurrence.

So, the cancer blogging goes on.


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