Archive for October, 2011

Mail Call

Today in the mail I received two things. One was a lovely gift from the nice lady in AZ. She made me cute hats for the winter. I will take pictures of them on my actual head after I look more presentable. 🙂 My hair is so thin that they will most certainly be welcome. You’ll see, they’re very cute. Thank you Betsy!


I also received a package that I purchased. It is lollipops. The other day I was lamenting the lack of roast beef flavored jaw breakers, so I went out looking for non-traditional flavors of candy. I walk around all the time with the most horrible taste in my mouth, and I really am overdosing on mint, and ginger and your basic fruit flavors. I wanted something that I can pretend is food.


I’ll let you know how it turns out!


Today at radiation there were two women in the waiting room and they were very loud. Things were running behind so I was there for a very long time. They spent much time talking about how lucky they were that their cancer had not spread to the lymph nodes. Cause you know, once that happens you’re done for! Geesh….I was happy to get the hell out of there!

Eight more abdominal radiations to go!



I’ve had this thought for an image stuck in my head for days so I finally used my forced sitting still to see if I could get it on paper. Draft #1. Yeah, I now proportions are off but it gave me a starting point. No symbolism there, right? My son ran out and got me a 36 pack of crayola colored pencils. Lovely.


Xanga is very very quiet this week.  Change of seasons?

I dunno, but I am stuck in bed so you all better start posting!

The hair below is attached to my head! I flipped it over my eyes and realized how nasty it is getting.  Once I’m done with Chemo and radiation I think I will probably end up getting the bottom three or four inches cut off to clean up the really bad damage.


That is all I have today.


It’s the little things

I received an unexpected gift in the mail yesterday. Those are really the best kind aren’t they? I’ve been Christmas shopping for the last two’s weeks online so it’s been a constant parade of boxes to my door. I am very friendly with the postman just in case it’s raining some day But I digress! I received a beautiful floral envelope that was a half inch thick, and another beautiful yellow envelope. I opened my yellow envelope first because it was from Daisy. Daisy misses me and sends me cards about every two weeks. Every card calls me her angel so she always gets first opens. 😉

Anyway! Back to my floral envelope. It was so pretty that I didn’t want to open it. But, I did, come on! I don’t get that many presents! It was a sweet note from my friend Deb. Deb lives an hour away, and we’ve been in many of the same places, and at least on one occasion at the same time, but never met. I think this might be for the best because we’re the same age but she is tall and gorgeous and I think I might feel a little small and plain next to her! Deb included with her sweet note a pack of notecards for me to send out. And they have my name (spelled correctly) on them! I’m sure it’s yet another ego thing, but I love things with my name on them!  Everyone should have a friend like Deb. We share very similar tastes in books as well so it’s been a very fulfilling long distance friendship. Thank you so much @Tnuts  !  Of course now I have to send a note on them to my other friend @Ninasusan because of the picture on the notecards, so it’s a double gift.


Have a great day guys!





Some People count Sheep

Pizza, Pizza, Pizza…

Vegetarian burrito with Queso Sauce & guacamole



An Apple

Panera  Pick 2 Sandwich Mediterranean Veggie Salad – any of the salads with fruit (meat on the side to take home to the dog)

Squash, potatoes, shallots, asparagus, Italian Egg Plant chopped up tossed with Olive Oil and some Sea Salt & Ground Pepper – roasted in oven

Bob Evans Harvest Omelet & a biscuit

Jimmy Johns Veggie Sub on French Bread, no mayo add mustard.  Mostly for the bread.

Dr. MacDougalls Pad Thai Noodles

Green Giant Rice, Pea and Mushroom Medley.

My husbands Pasta and tomato sauce, with extra sauce & veggies.

Darla’s Thai – Gang Panang Veggie Curry

Baskins Robbins – Golden Ribbon Ice Cream..wait…I could probably eat that now.

DeGage – A little bit of everything. I’ll wait until my stomach is fully recovered for this and have a celebratory dinner here for end of treatment.



I’ve noticed over the last week or so that I feel like I’m constantly twitching. Like there are little tiny electrical impulses running in my legs or torso. It’s very odd.

I finally watched the most recent episode of The Walking Dead. I do like that show. I’m also reading the third book in a trilogy of Zombie books.

I bought a bra this evening. This is almost notable because of why. Somewhere I lost a bra. I am confused by this. Somewhere in a hospital or a hotel in Texas maybe? Just gone…

I also ordered some tights. Black and Brown. Someday soon I will go buy a plain brown skirt, and a plain black skirt and I will wear skirts with tights with quirky shoes for the winter. I don’t care if it doesn’t look right. I will do it anyway. Because Lois said I could. I have been Christmas shopping online for the last two weeks. I don’t want to have to worry about it in December. I want to spend December recovering and feeling good.

My sister gave me instructions to make what “they” call a pancake. it’s not. It’s one egg, and a half a banana with some cinnamon & vanilla. Toss it into a food processor then cook in like a pancake. It actually comes out like a beautiful crepe! I was so happy. One more food to add to my list of things I can eat. I doused it with maple syrup and it was so good. I can think of all sorts of other things to combine with it when I’m back on normal food. I would most certainly make it again.

I am mostly sitting here killing time until it’s acceptable for me to go to sleep. I am tired. I will not have my car tomorrow so I will stay home in the morning and my daughter will pick me up at 11:45 and take me for my radiation treatment and blood work and then she will take me to work. She is also going to come hang out with me all day on Thursday for chemo/radiation.

I have The Insider playing on my TV while I type this. I do not like it. I am not really a celebrity news kind of person. 

I also made soup today for tomorrow. I threw a couple of vegetable bouillon cubes into a pan with a handful of frozen peas, frozen carrots, frozen turnip greens and turnips and a handful of rice. Then I let it cook until everything was mush. It might not taste the best but it should stay in my stomach. 

Good Night! Sleep Tight.



Well, that was a rough one.

Never made it out of bed today. Well, I guess that’s not true. I watched Amazing Race in the livingroom with my husband, and I played thirty minutes worth of poker with my son.

Mostly I stayed in bed and stared at the ceiling, I read a book, I listened to music. Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. Each chemo takes longer to recover from, and each radiation treatment adds just a little more effect to the side effects. 

Once again I am ever so grateful that I am in the position that when I feel this bad I can just curl up in bed and feel sorry for myself until I feel better. When I need something I can yell, or text, or send a message to my wonderful family and they will do for me, what I need to get through this. 

Hopefully tomorrow things have settled down internally, and my brain is a little sharper. So much to do, so few working brain synapses.

I really need to remember this later and find a way to give back, specifically, and in the greater sense.



Phone Camera Cleaning

I decided that even with my current level of Steroid & Chemo psychosis it was probably safe to post pictures. Today was doctor day and I wish they wouldn’t do it on the day after chemo. I’m sure I sound like a crazy person. Had to sit through a lecture on weight loss from the doctor, and before that met with the nutritionist who was amazed by my fantastically creative diet. 🙂 She also made me cry! It wasn’t in sadness about my lack of Mexican food but instead in joy about my wonderful family.

My phone had 483 pictures on it.  Oops.  You only get a half dozen.  Then I accidentally deleted the remain off my phones.  Oops!  This is why I do not work on Friday, I am afraid I would delete a server.

This is the food that is currently keeping me awake and happy.  The all purpose sweet potato. I scrubbed up a bunch then baked them in foil. After they cooled I wrapped them in plastic wrap and threw them in the freezer. I can thaw them out and throw them in my mini food processor and then add cinnamon & honey, or salt & pepper depending on my whim.


This is pureed steamed cauliflower, turnip greens & parsnip. I think the greens were a bad idea. They are not digesting well. But, I like the flavor with a little olivio and salt & pepper.


Pop it into the processor and good to go! Tonight I think I will try peas and carrots,



This was a facebook picture I put up yesterday but it was too cute not to put here as well. My beagle was very upset when I came home yesterday and went to bed instead of feeding her. She kept flopping onto her side and then staring up at me in different positions trying to prove to me that she needed to eat or the circumstances would be dire.


Yogurt, Frozen Blueberry, Frozen Banana in a blender.  NICE!

Memorializing what was supposed to be my very last blood draw in an arm. It wasn’t.




This nice nurse had recently transferred from a different hospital and was learning all of the new equipment. After the four IV try on my already bruised and battered arms a different nurse came and did it.

I would like to say that I caught my husband as he was about to vomit from the grossness of it all, but alas, it was just a cough.

Immediately after they put in the port.

My first chemo with the port! The port site itself is still pretty sore but the chemo drugs did not hurt.  Six hours of no hurt. It was wonderful . Sadly when they took off the dressings for the first time since the surgery they found infection at the top site. Where that band-aid is. It’s just a surface one but 1.) something more to watch, 2.) annoying since that means I got the infection in the operating room.



This is what it looks like now. One very big very ugly bruise! It’s way uglier than it looks in this picture. 

I’m like a little kid aren’t I, showing off my booboos. 🙂



Four down, two to go!

Chemo/Steroid crazy kicking in.  Please disregard all posts, emails, IM’s and texts until Sunday!


You knew I would have to blog about it, right?

I received a surprising message on my Facebook today. It was from a neighbor of mine letting me know that she was in her recovery stage from cancer and that she wished me well. It’s funny how something like cancer can form an immediate bond. 

I know I’ve talked about this before, I am not close with any of my neighbors. I am basically a friendly person but not really outgoing. Does that make sense? My husband on the other hand would be whatever is the polar opposite of friendly with neighbors. He’s friendly enough with people he will never see again but if there is a chance that they may become “too” friendly he will withdraw very quickly. (sorry honey!) Our house has always been private. It’s only for us. We don’t have parties, we don’t have company. If we want to socialize we do it elsewhere. So, this of course all leads to not a whole lot of neighborhood friendships!

So you see why this was a surprising message to me. Isn’t it nice though? Just one person acknowledging another’s troubles and offering support. The world would be better if more people did that when they think about it.



I did eat that Onion Ring yesterday. OMG! It was so good! And I was so sick afterwards. See, the problem isn’t that I’m not hungry. I am HUNGRY! The problem is that they are pummeling my digestive system with radiation and it does not want to digest food. So anything that’s difficult to digest in any way shape or form makes me very very sick. In some ways it’s a good lesson in self-control. I can have the immediate gratification of eating whatever I want, but the long term effects are bad.  Not much longer though. As of tomorrow I have three weeks of radiation to go.


I think I’ll go start my Zombie book now.

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